Finding Our Way Through Disorientation

We are all discovering ourselves at this point in history living into a new reality marked by grief and loss from the global coronavirus pandemic. Weddings, concerts, meetings, travel plans, school attendance, and more have been canceled in the wake of the virus. It has forced us to process both individual and collective grief in the face of an uncertain future which we are powerless to control. 

The disruptions in the normal routines and rhythms of everyday life contribute to the residual unease and sadness that we are all feeling. Not only are we mourning the loss of thousands of lives, but we are also mourning the loss of regular practices, from seeing our co-workers to engaging in the mundane routines that we previously took for granted. 

Consider how much has already been lost, and how much more we may continue to lose: the lives already taken by the coronavirus, along with the lives currently in jeopardy, and many more falling ill every day. The lost livelihoods, the dashed plans. Entire families destitute today who were getting by just a month ago. Upended routines. Postponed celebrations and funerals. Financial insecurity. Isolation. 

Along with the emotion of grief often comes a sense of disorientation.  Disorientation occurs when you cannot easily focus on the time, place or activities that are happening at the current moment. A person is said to be disoriented when they seem at a loss for what's going on, often bringing on a state of confusion and fogginess.  If disorientation continues for long periods of time, it can lead to states of anxiety and depression as lack of focus can bleed into lack of purpose. 

What can we do to move through these losses without losing our sense of self and becoming derailed on the tracks of life?   

Give Yourself Time 

Giving yourself time to feel without rushing yourself through the process allows you to work through the pain of loss. Sitting with uncomfortable feelings is something many struggle to do, but coming to grips with what is and accepting all feelings can ultimately free us to encounter new stages of peace. 

Prioritize Self Care 

In the midst of crisis, it becomes paramount to assign priority toward taking care of our minds and bodies.  Focus on the basics like drinking water, eating and getting enough sleep.  Take the pressure off yourself to do too much and remember that this acute stage of overwhelm will one day fade. 

Engage the Present to Increase Focus 

We all know the term “mindful awareness” and can acknowledge there is truth in it’s ability to quiet our racing thoughts and bring us back to the most important point in time: now.  By staying present to our breath and noticing what’s around us, we distance ourselves from the narrative of future worries or past traumas and can open more fully to what lies in front of us, in the here and now. 

Create Orienting Rhythms 

For many of us, the parts of the week that kept us oriented have disappeared and we find ourselves in a flow of time that makes it hard to know what day of the week or month of the year it is.  Create markers that signify regular rhythms that ground us such as Friday night designated as pizza night, Tuesday is workout day, and Sunday as rest day.  Starting your day by a certain time regardless of whether you leave your home for work or not can also initiate a point of orientation to our day.  By creating a few recurring markers, we can situate ourselves more firmly in time and space which may ease our minds to gain more focus on the tasks at hand. 

Find Support 

Checking in with loved ones, phoning a friend, or connecting virtually with others can reduce our sense of isolation.  Reaching out for professional support from a coach or therapist can help alleviate feelings of stress and guide us through our emotions so we become more internally freed up to make focused decisions.  Now, more than ever, these intentional efforts to find others for support can dictate how well we navigate uncertainty and overwhelm which can funnel their way into our minds.  No one is meant to navigate this journey alone.  

Above all, it is vital to give yourself permission to mourn the losses and to treat yourself with gentle kindness as you wade through the valley of grief.   To heal from our suffering and transform it into a source of growth and wisdom requires a journey through the very center of it.  In due time and with some mindful effort, we will once again find the ability to focus that will guide us to a place of inner peace and open the doors toward reimagining our future.